Tuesday, December 11, 2007

The Tree, The Leaf and The Wind : Losers

Here's an email from JM:


People call me "Tree" . I had dated 5 girls when I was in Pre-U.
There's one girl who I love a lot but never dared to go after. She
didn't have a pretty face, or good figure, nor an outstanding charm.
She was just an ordinary girl. I liked her. I really liked her. I liked
her innocence, her frankness, her intelligence and her fragility. Reason
for not going after her was because I felt somebody so ordinary like her
was not a good match for me. I was also afraid that after we were
together, all the feelings would vanish. I was also afraid other's
gossip would hurt her. I felt that if she were my girl, she'd be mine
ultimately and I didn't have to give up everything just for her. The
last reason, made her accompanying me for 3 years. She watched me chase
other girls, and I have made her heart cry for 3 years. She was a good
actress and me a demanding director. When I kissed my 2nd girlfriend,
she bumped into us. She was embarrassed but smiled and said, "Go on!"
before running off. The next day, her eyes were swollen like a walnut.
I didn't want to know what caused her to cry. Later that day, I returned
from soccer training to get something and watched her cry in the
classroom for an hour or so. My 4th girlfriend didn't like her. There
was once when both of them quarreled. I know that based on her
character, she's not the type that will start off the quarrel. But I
still sided my girlfriend. I shouted at her and ignored her feelings
then walked off with my girlfriend. The next day, she was laughing and
joking with me like nothing happened. I know she was hurt but she didn't
know deep down inside I was hurt too. When I broke up with my 5th
girlfriend, I asked her out. Later that day, I told her I had something
to tell her. I told her about my breakup. Coincidentally, she has
something to tell me too, about her getting together. I knew who the guy
was. His pursuit for her had been the talk of the school.
I didn't show her my heartache, just smiles and best wishes. Once I
reached home, I couldn't breathe. Tears rolled and I broke down. How
many times have I seen her cry for the man who didn't acknowledge her
presence? During graduation, I received a text message from her.

"Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or because the Tree

didn't ask her to stay..."


People call me "Leaf". During the 3 years of Pre-U, I was on very close
terms with a guy as buddy kind. But when he had his 1st girlfriend, I
learned a feeling I never should've learned - jealousy.
Sourness to the extreme limit. They were only together for 2 months.
When they broke up, I hid my happiness. But after a month, he got
together with another girl. I liked him and I know he liked me. But why
won't he pursue me? If he really loves me, why didn't he make the first
move? Whenever he had a new girlfriend, my heart would hurt.
After some time, I began to suspect that this was one sided love. If he
didn't like me, why did he treat me so well? It's beyond what you will
normally do for a friend. I know his likes, his habits. But his feelings
towards me I can never figure out. You can't expect from a girl like me
to ask him. Despite that, I still wanted to be by his side. Care for
him, accompany him, love him. Hoping that one day, he will come to love
me too. And because of this, I waited for him. Sometimes, I wondered if
I should continue waiting. The pain, the dilemma accompanied me for 3
At the end of my 3rd year, a junior pursues me. He's like the cool and
gentle wind, trying to blow off a leaf from a tree. In the end, I
realized that I wanted to give this wind a small footing in my heart.
I know the wind will bring the leaf to a better land. Finally leaf left
the tree, but the tree only smiled and didn't ask the leaf to stay.

"Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or because the Tree

didn't ask her to stay..."


People call me "Wind". Because I like a girl called "Leaf". Because
she's so dependent on the tree so I have to be a gust wind, a wind that
will blow her away. When I first met her, it was 1 month after I
transfer to the new school. I saw a petite person looking at my seniors
and me playing soccer. During ECA time, she will always be sitting
there. Be it alone or with her friends, looking at him. When he talks
with girls, there's jealousy in her eyes. When he looked at her, there's
a smile in her eyes. Looking at her became my habit.
Just like she likes to look at him. One day, she didn't appear. I felt
something amissed. I can't explain the feeling except it's a kind of
uneasiness. The senior was not there as well. I went to their classroom,
hid outside and saw my senior scolding her. Tears were in her eyes while
he left. The next day, I saw her at her usual place, looking at him. I
walked over and smiled at her, took out a note and gave it to her. She
was surprised. She looked at me, smiled, and accepts the note. The day
after, she appeared and passes me a note and left. "Leaf's heart is too
heavy and the wind couldn't blow her away". "It's not that leaf's heart
is too heavy. It's simply because leaf never wants to leave the tree". I
replied her note with this statement and slowly she started to talk to
me and accept my presents and phone calls. I know that the person she
loves is not me. But I have this perseverance that one day, I will make
her like me. Within 4 months, I have declared my love for her no less
than 20 times. Every time, she will divert away from the topic. But I
never give up. If I'm really decided for her to be mine, I will
definitely use all means to win her over. I can't remember how many
times I have declared my love to her. Although I know she will always
try to change the topic, I still bear a small ray of hope deep within
me, that she will agree to be my girlfriend. And so I asked her again. I
didn't hear any reply from her over the phone. I asked, "What are you
doing? How come you didn't want to reply?" "I'm nodding my head", she
said. "Huh?" I couldn't believe my ears. "I'm nodding my head", she
replied loudly. I hang up the phone, quickly changed, took a taxi and
rushed to her place. My hands were trembling when I press the doorbell.
I hugged her tightly as she opened the door.

"Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or because the Tree

didn't ask her to stay..."

To the tree:
Isa kang malaking tanga! Andami mo kasing kaartehan at yan.. nawalan ka tuloy ng taong hinahangad mo.. Sabi nga sa Ally Mcbeal, better na magregret ka sa mga bagay na ginawa mio kaysa sa mga hindi mo ginawa.. Ayan, nakawala na si Leaf..

Lesson learned sana yan na do what you want.. Minsan, no matter what the consequences are. Obvious na naman siya... Nagpapaka-pakipot ka pa jan..

Wait, kukuha lang ako na match at susunugin na kita...

To the leaf:
Bakit mo naman sinisisi si Leaf... Onting Landi lang yan.. Di mo pa gawin..

One sided love my ass ka jan! Eh nag-make ka ba ng move.. HINDI!

Nag-iinarte ka lang talaga...

Wait, maghuhukay lang ako at ibabaon kita sa lupa ng buhay!

To the wind:
Ikaw yung pinaka-tanga sa kanilang lahat...

Dapat sau... Pinupuno ng usok mula sa truck, jeep, smokers... tapos, lasunin at ihagis sa outer space...

Ayaw nga sau eh habol ka pa ng habol... Naku pag nag-make ng move si tree.. Magiging one more chance ka.. Dapat hinanap mo na lang si smoke at nagdate kau.. Malay mo magka-in love-an kayo..

Mahirap maging martyr... Kaya wag ka sanang matanggalan ng kuko at mabitin ng patiwarik..

Sa inyong lahat, good luck na lang..

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